Why Your Goals Didn’t Work Before (and how to fix it in 2025) 🪩💫🥂

Jan 1

In today’s post we’ll chat thru…

✻ Why most people struggle to achieve their goals: We’ll unpack the common reasons goal-setting falls short—like perfectionism, lack of clarity, and overwhelm—and how to overcome these roadblocks.
✻ Perspective shifts for the new year: Discover how embracing progress over perfection and shifting your mindset can set the tone for a transformative 2025.
✻ A framework for goals that stick: Learn the GROWTH-based goal-setting method to create goals that are actionable, meaningful, and sustainable all year long.

LET’S DIVE IN. 🖤

Hello, hello, friends! Welcome back to The Self Care Sisterhood Podcast AND welcome to 2025!!!! I hope your holiday season was full of lots of memories and that you were able to soak in and savor this season.

Today, we’re diving into a topic that’s on everyone’s mind this time of year: goal setting. But not just any goal setting — we’re talking about why your goals maybe haven’t been working and how we can fix that coming into 2025. I want you to get to the end of 2025 and look back in awe of all that you accomplished in your life this year. So that’s the heartbeat behind today’s episode.

If you’ve ever found yourself setting the same resolutions over and over again, only to feel frustrated or unsure of how to make progress, this episode is for you. We’re unpacking why traditional goal setting doesn’t work, how to shift your mindset as you approach 2025, and a practical framework that will help you turn those dreams into reality.

And, speaking of setting yourself up for success, I have to tell you about something exciting we’re kicking off this month: our Unstoppable Self Vision Board Workshop!

This isn’t your typical vision board party — it’s a powerful experience designed to help you create a clear, motivating vision for 2025. You’ll leave with:
✨ A goal-setting workbook to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
✨ A fully crafted vision board tailored to your goals and habits.
✨ And a Canva template to make it easy, whether you prefer digital or physical boards.

If you’re ready to take what you’ll learn in today’s episode and go even deeper, this workshop is for you. I’ll share more details at the end + in the show notes, so stay tuned as we dive into setting the foundation for your best year yet. Whether you’re listening on your commute, squeezing in a quick walk, or tackling your to-do list, let’s make our time together today count. 🖤

COMMON REASONS Why WE Struggle with Setting Goals

Setting goals can feel empowering when that ball drops, but more often than not, we end up frustrated by mid January when our plans fizzle out before they’ve had a chance to succeed. Did you know there’s actually a national day recognizing when people will give up on their New Year’s Resolutions?! Seriously. It’s called "Quitter's Day" and it marks the day when many people give up on their New Year's resolutions. Quitter's Day is observed on the second Friday of January…so we’re looking in real time this year, by about January 10th. Isn’t that wild?! Studies show that people are more likely to quit their resolutions on Fridays, and the second Friday in January is when motivation for resolutions often fades. I don’t want that to be you this year. I want you to learn how to fall in love with the LONG GAME when it comes to those dreams laid on your heart. So before we dive into how to set better goals, let’s address the elephant in the room —

WHY DO WE SUCK AT SETTING + ACHIEVING GOALS?

Here are some of the most frequent reasons people struggle with setting and achieving their goals:

Perfectionism — You wait until everything feels “perfect” before you start. The result? You never actually get started because perfection isn’t achievable.

Fear of Failure — You avoid risks and stay in your comfort zone to protect yourself. But growth happens when we embrace challenges, even if it means stumbling along the way.

Lack of Clarity — Your goals are vague or undefined, leaving you unsure of where to focus your energy. Without a clear vision, you can’t create a meaningful path forward.

Procrastination — You delay action because you feel overwhelmed or afraid of the effort required. Instead of making progress, you stay stuck in a cycle of inaction.

Overwhelm from Too Many Goals — You try to tackle everything at once, which leads to burnout and scattered focus. Less is more—focusing on fewer, high-impact goals yields better results.

Lack of Support — You don’t seek help or accountability from others, trying to do everything alone. Community and encouragement can make the difference between giving up and persevering.

The key to making real progress isn’t about perfection—it’s about recognizing what’s been holding you back and addressing it head-on. When you identify the ways you’ve been sabotaging your efforts, you can create strategies to overcome them and set yourself up for success.

PERSPECTIVE SHIFTS FOR THE NEW YEAR

Before we dive into how to set better goals, I wanna talk about THE ONE THING that will make or break your success this year: your mindset. I always used to tell my fitness clients that the heaviest weight they had to lose was the weight between their ears and I think this applies beyond fitness. This is true for all of us. Achieving your goals isn’t always about working harder—sometimes it’s about seeing things differently. Here are a few perspective shifts I want to share with you for 2025 that have radically changed the way I show up to my journey + work towards my goals:

Perspective Shifts to Embrace

ON CHOICES: When I was an elementary school teacher we would use a marble jar as a system for rewards. It’s pretty simple. Marbles in the jar when you do the thing. Marbles out of the jar when you don’t do the thing. After leaving the classroom, though, and working with women in their wellness and goals I realized that this same principle applies when it comes to our choices. Your choices are either leading you closer to your goals or they aren’t. Plain and simple. So consider the marble jar mentality instead of the old perfectionist mentality. Every small win…every small choice…in the direction of your desires…adds up. Keep adding marbles to your jar and see what happens.
ON FAILURE: I used to have a rough relationship with failure. Mainly stemming from my days in the performing arts/dance world. Either you got the move right or you didn’t. And you rehearsed until it was “perfect.” This served me in that world but in life it really doesn’t bc the narrative I would take into life would be take failure and make it mean something like I’m not good enough. Instead I’ve adopted a fresh perspective on failure as a TEACHER. Every time I fail it simply means there’s information I don’t quite know yet. I get to take these lessons and allow them to shape my GROWTH. Didn’t stick to a goal? Reflect on what went wrong and adjust instead of giving up. For me, the true failure is giving up before I allow something to be good or never even trying in the first place.
ON GRATITUDE: I’ve had many realizations over the last decade especially when it comes to my health that help me realize what a privilege it is to be able to do so many of the things I get to do — here’s one: I taught this young man named Ralphie for many years in dance. He was one of my favorite students. The kind you put a lot of tough love on bc you see how much potential they’ve got. He was that one for me. He went on to make a career and calling out of dance and I couldn’t have been a more proud mama bear. A few years ago, though, he found himself in the hospital with meningitis and lost both of his legs. The one thing he used to make money and live with purpose was taken from him overnight. He literally woke up in the hospital and had no legs. Like can you even imagine? And here’s the kicker. He never lost his spirit. He was SO GRATEFUL to be alive that he never once complained about losing his legs. He worked hard. Rehabilitated himself. And learned to walk and dance using his prosthetic legs. Perspective shift, right? Like how lucky am I to have legs that GET TO move? How lucky am I to have breath in my lungs that GETS TO be pushed during a run. How lucky am I to GET this day in front of me to pursue all the things God has laid on my heart. It’s a perspective shift from HAVE TO to GET TO. You don’t HAVE TO do anything this year, friends. But you GET TO do the things that matter to you. Instead of seeing your goals as a chore or a burden to an easy life, what if instead you saw the incredible PRIVILEGE and OPPORTUNITY you have in front of you to grow and make progress. Shift gratitude into the process and see how it changes things for you.
ON THE JOURNEY: I used to be the person who would wait all day for 5pm to hit. All week for Friday to come. All summer for winter. All winter for summer. And essentially, all of my life to be “happy.” I was the classic “I’ll be happy when…” person. And then I realized that I was allowing life to pass me by while I was waiting for all of these things. Life is here. It’s happening. Right now. And the true prize, I think, is if we can fall in love with the PROCESS…the journey on the way to where we desire. This goes back into romanticizing your life and making sure the life you’re living is the one YOU DESIRE…not what’s expected of you or what someone else is doing. Fall in love with the journey and I promise it will shift how you approach your goals.

HOW TO CREATE GOALS THAT ACTUALLY STICK

So, how can we set goals that truly stick? Well…first off…when you set a goal I want you to know that there WILL BE WORK + EFFORT required. A goal doesn’t just happen. It has to be worked for. So you have to figure out what is WORTH IT enough to get uncomfortable for. What is WORTH IT enough to work towards? What is WORTH IT enough to fall down and pick yourself back up for. Because all of this will happen in the coming year. You’ll be uncomfortable. It will require effort. And you will not get it right, right away. You’ll fall down, stumble, and have to decide if you want to pick yourself back up and keep moving forward or not.

We’ve chatted before in this space about the GROWTH-based goal-setting framework—a signature approach we use inside The Sisterhood. But I want to break it down again today because this is how you decide if the goals you have are WORTH working for. Real quick recap of what GROWTH stands for:

G - Goal: Clearly define what you want to achieve. Make it specific and meaningful to you AND consider ALL areas of life when setting goals. I highly suggest rating your physical health, mental/emotional health, spiritual life, relationships, finances, environments, hobbies + fun, and your professional life on a scale from 1 to 10 and begin goal setting from there based on what areas need attention in your life.
R - Reason: Understand why this goal matters. Connecting it to your core values will fuel your motivation because it will be MEANINGFUL to YOU. Not just what Sally on the internet is doing. Connect this to YOUR LIFE.
O - Others Impacted: You know as well as I do that when you set goals with other people in mind you are FAR MORE LIKELY to come thru. That’s because as humans we tend to want to show up for others more than we do for ourselves. There are so many reasons for this, but for this purpose, let’s use this to our advantage. Consider who else benefits when you achieve this goal and also, while you’re working towards this goal, too. And then if you want to go even deeper, I dare you to share that with them. Tell them WHY you are doing this for them and keep that at the forefront on those days you lose motivation and don’t feel like showing up.
W - Weekly Check-ins: The first time we skip our workout isn’t when the weight comes on and we get unhealthy. It’s when we repeat that behavior. So checking in is SO ESSENTIAL to your success bc when you regularly assess your progress, you can catch yourself faster if you’re falling off track. Weekly reflections help you stay on track and make necessary adjustments and it’s as simple as sitting down on a Sunday and looking at your past week and then adjusting for the week ahead.
T - Timeframe: I think this is an unsung hero of goal setting that we don’t really consider. Not every goal needs to be worked on everyday for the entire year. Some goals are for a season. Some goals are meant to become routine. Some goals take you picking up the phone and calling the doctor. Not every goal’s timeline is the same. I love to look at my calendar and decide — is this a Q1 goal? is this a daily habit I’m working to implement? is this a summertime goal? is this a weekly routine that needs implementing? is this something i can achieve by booking an appointment or having a conversation? When are you working towards this? What does that look like? This year I encourage you to set a realistic timeline for your goal. Breaking it into manageable chunks prevents overwhelm.
H - Habits, Behaviors, Routines: Ya’ll know this one is my jam. It’s truly the secret sauce of any goal. What you do will be a direct reflection of what you will achieve in 2025. So. Identify the actions required to move the needle towards your goals and then focus on building sustainable habits that support moving towards your goals in healthy ways.

Okay. I know we love a tangible example. So let's walk through one together. Suppose your goal is to "improve physical health." Let’s try THIS instead:

G (Goal): I want to run a 5K race in under 30 minutes.
R (Reason): Running improves my mental and physical health, and completing a race has always been a personal aspiration.
O (Others Impacted): My family benefits because I'll have more energy to engage with them, and I can inspire friends to pursue their fitness goals.
W (Weekly Check-ins): Every Sunday, I'll review my training progress and adjust my plan as needed.
T (Timeframe): I aim to achieve this goal in 12 weeks, aligning with a local 5K event. Bonus: figure out what 5K you want to run and then sign up for it. Reverse back 12 weeks on the calendar and BOOM…you know WHEN you are going to start working towards this goal. Bonus bonus…make sure this 12 week period is not also stacked onto something really stressful, like if you’re an accountant, maybe wait until tax season is over for this one.
H (Habits, Behaviors, Routines): I'll establish a routine of running three times a week, incorporating strength training twice a week, and maintaining a balanced diet to support my training. Since I am not starting my training for the 5K until summer, I will focus in Q1 on nutrition and hydration. In Q2 I will add in a more structured workout plan. And then in Q3 I will be ready to train.

Do you see how this is WAY better than simply saying “I want to be healthier in 2025?!” This creates more thought and intention surrounding your desires with actual goals, reasons, and a smart timeframe so you don’t burnout by the second Friday in January like everyone else. 2025 is a long game year for you, friends. Let’s adopt a marathon mentality vs overnight quick fixes, deal?

BONUS TIPS FOR STICKING TO YOUR GOALS:

Before we wrap up today, I wanna give you a few more tips that help me when it comes to all things goals:

Start Small: I know I talked about this before when I was talking about perspective shifts, but it’s so important I’m going to say it again. SMALL STEPS IN THE DIRECTION OF YOUR DESIRES MATTERS. It all adds up. And it also makes it MANAGEABLE which is so important when you’re starting something new. Begin with manageable steps so you can build confidence and momentum and just know that every small achievement is paving the way for larger successes down the road. The world is gonna tell you to go big and I’m here to tell you that the world is burnt out, overwhelmed, unhealthy, and mostly quitting on their goals come January 10th this year. Let’s be different than the rest of them. Deal?
Track Your Progress: There’s a quote that says “what gets measured gets done” and while I don’t think everything is measureable per se, I do know there is POWER in tracking. Last year I tracked my alcohol free + caffeine free days for the first time and the goal wasn’t to be AF or CF, but ya’ll…I significantly reduced BOTH without even really trying, simply because I was tracking. It feels good to be able to check off the day as alcohol free or caffeine free and the more I tracked, the more I paused before pouring that cup or glass. Track in whatever way works for you. For me, my planner has a built in tracker each week but you can use a journal, planner, or digital app to monitor your habits and milestones. There are so many resources out there so find what works for you.
Celebrate Small Wins: We have an ongoing joke in our family from about 6 New Year’s ago. It was the start of a fresh year and with our wedding approaching, we both set a “sweating for the wedding” goal to kick off 2018. We picked a program to follow and I kid you not…it was Tuesday of week one (like the second day of the program) and when my husband got home from work I proudly greeted him and told him I bought myself leggings to celebrate. He was so confused and I told him I was proud I was on track with our program. He looked at me and said “you know it’s only the second day, right?!” And that’s the funny part…it felt like two months by day two and so celebrating that two days in I was still on track felt like an achievement. Basically I’m saying — Acknowledge and reward yourself for progress, no matter how small. Celebrations reinforce positive behavior and keep morale high.
Accountability: I feel like accountability gets a bad rap bc when we fall off the common shared feeling is one of shame. Friends, if you feel ashamed of yourself in your support circle, you need a new support circle. True accountability is filled with grace for those moments when you fall, and truth to nudge you to get back up. Having someone to support and encourage you increases your chances of success. And it doesn’t have to be anything major. We talked about this recently in The Sisterhood Membership — one member used a friend to text with everyday for support on their fitness journey and another member actually used an app for support on her journey to unplug off social. Let’s not over-complicate what accountability looks like. And…shameless plug — if you're looking for a supportive growth-based community, you 100% should join The Sisterhood Membership. This season we’re talking all about GOAL SETTING and so this is the perfect time to dive in with us.

Alright friends…today, we covered a lot of ground, and if you’re still here, I know you’re serious about making 2025 a year of real progress and meaningful change. In order to set goals that actually stick in 2025…

✻ We’ve got to get honest about the common reasons we struggle with goals—whether it’s perfectionism, fear of failure, lack of clarity, or even trying to juggle too much at once. Recognizing these patterns is the first step to breaking free from them.

✻ We need some perspective shifts for the new year. Instead of focusing on what went wrong or what we didn’t accomplish, we’re choosing to embrace growth, patience, and celebrating progress over perfection.

✻ And remember in order to create goals that actually stick I encourage you to use the GROWTH-based goal-setting method—a framework that keeps you anchored in your ‘why,’ builds consistent habits, and helps you stay accountable to your vision.

Now, if today’s episode resonated with you and you’re ready to take this work deeper—to go from identifying your barriers and setting powerful goals to creating a clear and exciting vision for your year—I’d love for you to join me for The Unstoppable Self Vision Board Workshop.

Here’s what you’ll get:
✨ A goal-setting workbook that expands on what we talked about today, helping you map out a plan to bridge the gap between where you are and where you want to be.
✨ A 90-minute guided workshop where you’ll walk away with a fully crafted vision board for 2025 that’s aligned with your goals, habits, and purpose.
✨ A Canva template to design your board digitally or use as a guide for a physical one.

And if you can’t join live? No worries—you’ll get all the materials and a replay to do it on your schedule.

If you’re ready to step into alignment, clarity, and confidence, this workshop is for YOU. Grab your spot now, and let’s make 2025 the year everything changes. 🪩🥂

You’ve done the reflection—now let’s turn it into action. Let’s do this together! I’m rooting for you and I can’t wait to see you right here next time on The Self Care Sisterhood Podcast.

JOIN OUR ANNUAL VISION BOARD PARTY

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